Sorry Life - Im out Living

Thursday, August 04, 2016

My entire life, i've had goals and aspirations. i've always been a motivated person - i've alway truly believed that i was destined for great things, for deeper meaning, for broader perspectives and untold stories; or, maybe my Mother and her romantic idealism seeped into my soul and formed the voices in my head telling me these things. whatever the case may be, getting closer to 30 has definately put my life into perspective and the changes that have occured from turning 20 to turning 28 are drastic!


So, i had my first daughter when i was 21. i studied social work during my pregnancy and had her in class until she started daycare. i thought that it would be beautiful for her to listen to these conversations and it would grow her mind from a really young age.


somewhere in my second year i got pregnant with my son and around about the beginning of my third year of study he was born and also joined me in my classes until he started day care.


i eventually started working full time and have done so for the past 3 years in my current job. can i just say, having two under 5's and working full time is not easy. but then neither is staying at home.


throwing myself into study, working, being a mum and making those damn birthday parties and catch ups with friends is one of the most diffucult things i have experienced. juggling life, isnt really living.


i tried to sit down and think of what i had gained from my 20's. that right there above is my summary. of course there was love, there was laughter, there was self actualization and heart break but this right here pretty much summarised my 20's.


i just cant have that as my defining moments!


so in the last 12 month's i made a plan (as you do when you near 30 and have a good amount of life in your back pocket) and wanted to put myself first - so that my children could learn that working hard is important BUT so is LIVING!


so in the past 12 months, we have travelled further than i wanted to. we have booked our next vacation, we have family holidayd in the snow and planned an international family vacation - but scarily, we have decided to pack up ship and relocate (more on that in another post)


so yes, i started living + i can honestly say... i've never been happier.


putting my "to do" list (the personal ones) on the back burner and not making new goals as i cross off things on the list left me feeling like i was in limbo settling. i dont think we should ever settle. i think that we should always strive to better ourselves. to make those plans, to book that holiday and just LIVE!!!


it's made me a happier person at home, a happier mother, a happier employee, a better friend. i was anxious about 30 but now, i welcome it with open arms.


2 more birthday's to go!


xo the other side ox

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